Father O’Reilly announced to his flock that the dinner
celebrating his 25th anniversary at the parish would also
serve as his retirement party. When the night of the final
affair came, the festivities were to be opened by the mayor.
Unfortunately, city affairs caused the mayor to be late.

Father O’Reilly sensed those gathered for the dinner were
becoming impatient for the program to begin, so he decided
to take the microphone and share his reminiscences.

“It is hard to believe that it has been 25 years since I first
stepped through the doorway of this great House of
Worship,” he said. “I still remember the first confession I
heard here. It was on the day that I arrived. To this day it
remains the most outrageous error of judgment I’ve ever

“A young man, as I discerned from his voice, was extremely
remorseful as he told me about stealing money from his
parents so he could have an affair with the neighbor’s
daughter. He then used some of the money to get a fake ID
and used it to buy alcohol. The liquor left their judgment
impaired and sure enough, the night had led to promiscuity.
Several weeks had passed and the boy thought he had
contracted a venereal disease and needed money to get
tested. He got the money by stealing out of his best friend’s
till at work, resulting in the friend being fired. To get to the
doctor’s office he stole the neighbor’s car in the hopes that
his parent’s would not find out. The car was damaged when
he accidentally sideswiped a mailbox leaving scratches on
the passenger’s side of the car Since the neighbor rarely
walked to that side of the vehicle, the boy did not tell his
neighbor about the mishap.

Noticing the arrival of the mayor, the priest concluded.
“Since that day I have had many more pleasant memories,
for which I thank each and every one of you.”

The mayor, who was also a trustee of the church, took to the
microphone to present the parish’s gift for his quarter
decade of service.

What he said next astonished the congregation and proves
that being late to a meeting can cause the ultimate
embarrassment. To see what he said,  
click here.
As Aesop established hundreds of years ago with his
timeless fables we remember words best when we
become engaged in a story. Max has compiled an
anecdotal story collection designed to generate “ah-
ha” moments.
Click here to see more.

©2007, 2017 Max Impact, Rochester Hills, Michigan,USA
The confessional